This Was All Very Distracting
lying naked in front of an open refrigerator- touching a stranger or
- sheet of hotel stationery
- suffers the indignity of being accused of
- one hour each week
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This was all very distracting. I knew I had important business, but the details were growing foggier by the second. To tune out the bewigged erotic bandits and what they were doing with their hands, I pictured myself lying naked in front of an open refrigerator, my bare feet touching a stranger or perhaps an acquaintance holding a single sheet of hotel stationery, but it did no good. I was in the moment, for good or ill, and in the moment I was in a murky tunnel under an outhouse with a quartet of unusual, glowing, scantily clad women. I’m not a man who gladly suffers the indignity of being accused of easy virtue, but — as they say at the Academy — if the shoe fits, wear it for at least one hour each week.
“I believe he’s ready, Uncle Albatross,” said one of the octopus women.
“I believe you’re right, Uncle Periwinkle,” replied her bikini-sharing partner.
bonus points for using them in order