The Women Continued on Without Me
- a very acceptable person as far as we were concerned
- at the top of their lungs
- doing a weird semi run waddle
- my head whirled in dizziness
- I am a full-on karaoke person
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The women continued on without me. I stumbled to my feet and found Heinrich proffering a garden hose, which I used to rinse off. As I sat in the sun to dry off, Heinrich said, “Svetlana and I are in the market for a third, and Marnie was a very acceptable person as far as we were concerned. She’s petite enough that she’ll fit in the harness with Svetlana.” He gave me a wry look. “Assuming you didn’t just get one or both of them pregnant.”
I had nothing to say to that, which was fine because the women announced their own umbrellas’ inversions at the top of their lungs and anything I said would have been lost in the erotic cacophony.
As I dressed, Heinrich readied the hose again and went around the hedge doing a weird semi run waddle, with his half-removed bear suit dragging behind him. I wanted to leave before they came back, but couldn’t remember if I was supposed to be gathering information from them. When I tried to piece together the numerous conspiracies I was surrounded by, my head whirled in dizziness. Deciding that if I left I would only invite more chaos into my life, I stayed put.
From far away in the garden I heard the thumping beat of YMCA. You might not know this about me, but I am a full-on karaoke person, and few songs get me as jazzed as that disco classic. I jumped to my feet and got ready to sing.
bonus points for using them in order