Your Guinea Pigs Would Ask
“You were hunting whales?”- nine minutes by railway
- linking his eyeball movements to the computer
- You need a tiger
- your guinea pigs would
- taking a cocktail napkin
Your guinea pigs would ask, “You were hunting whales?” their piping voices protesting in unison and three-part harmony. And you’d reply that it was none of their business and go to your office, nine minutes by railway from your dingy garden apartment. On the way, you’d contemplate what’s missing in your life. You need a tiger, a security tiger with a special implant linking his eyeball movements to the computer. He might eat your guinea pigs, for which you would be grateful. You imagine him taking a cocktail napkin from the stack on the credenza and daintily blotting his whiskers. No more judgemental guinea pigs. They don’t know how it was, with those whales.
We definitely need a security tiger. That would be awesome.
A Guard Hamster! They are stealthy and unexpected…
Yes, that they are. Of course, unless you arm them (“Can I get a hamster with a friggin’ laser on its head?”) they’re also easily overwhelmed by intruders wearing heavy boots.