“You Stay Away From My Mother”
equally frustrated wife- snake-based consequences
- multicolored donkey wallpaper
- by an unidentified hand with red ink
- exchanged snuff-boxes
Tune in next time part 702 Click Here for Earlier Installments
“You stay away from my mother,” I said to John.
“Don’t listen to him,” Mother said, “or I’ll have a frustrated husband who’ll have an equally frustrated wife.”
Fleur hauled on my arm, spinning me to face her yet again. “You need to change into your ceremonial pajamas,” she scolded, thrusting a cloth bundle into my hands.
“Didn’t we already miss the reception?” I complained.
Nodding impatiently she said, “Showing up improperly dressed at the reception would have consequences, and since this is the second reception they’d be snake-based consequences.”
I sulked off to the nearest lavatory to change. It had multicolored donkey wallpaper, which was how I knew this wedding chapel was aboard a Contrarian zeppelin. A message had been smeared on the mirror by an unidentified hand with red ink on the fingertips. It said, “The wedding doesn’t count if they haven’t exchanged snuff-boxes.”
bonus points for using them in order