The Place To Stow Gordon
— which, by the way, is their normal state —- set of handcuff keys
- she had on those damn falsies
- “Just pretty much the basics.”
- sound waves, not X-rays
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The place to stow Gordon turned out to be Isaac’s apartment in the building across the street. She had a rabbit hutch in the bathroom, which became a goose hutch.
Isaac took my hand and led me into the next room. “Now I need you to see if my cheeks are rosy — which, by the way, is their normal state — or if there’s any bruising or other damage.” From her cleavage she pulled a set of handcuff keys on a silver chain. She took off the chain and handed me the keys, then turned around and bent over.
I discovered a keyhole in her belt, and, hoping I was reading this situation correctly, inserted the key. Her pants fell off, revealing a foam-rubber prosthetic posterior. How would she have even felt Gordon’s nip on her rump, if she had on those damn falsies?
“So far, so good,” I said. “Although, not exactly what I expected. What’s this for?”
“Just pretty much the basics.”
That was evidently thought to be a valid response.
“Well, everything I see here is intact. Not rosy, as such.”
“You’re not done with your examination, doctor.”
Her weird foundation garment also needed the handcuff key to unhook it. At which point I could assure her that the goose hadn’t goosed her too hard. Everything looked fine. In fact, I was at a loss to understand why she wore a fake butt over such a nice real one.
One phrase was printed on the inside of the prosthesis, which I was still trying to decode when Isaac offered to examine my cheeks, just to be safe. She fluttered her eyes at me. “After all, you were in the room with that goose too.”
For the next two hours, I didn’t get many chances to concentrate. But I made sure to memorize the words I’d seen inside her artificial derriere.
“sound waves, not X-rays.”
bonus points for using them in order