The Nunchuks Made Me Nervous
has a kick on it like a mule- until the forklift was encased in ice
- Boris has just given me a summary
- you could lose a finger otherwise
- for all of our reenactments
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The nunchuks made me nervous for a second, until I recognized them as the foam-rubber replicas we used for all of our reenactments of kung fu movie fights back when we were kids, before the Sacher Torte fiasco. It was crucial to use fake weapons, particularly swords; you could lose a finger otherwise.
Furry Boots announced, “Boris has just given me a summary of the auction’s expected outcome, and we’re falling behind schedule.”
“Call him back,” Jason said. “Tell him I have a plan.” She left.
“Wait, aren’t you supposed to be languishing in Oksana’s damp jail cell?” I demanded of my twin.
He sneered. “Everything was under control. You’re as confused as the Academy hockey coach. Remember when he substituted a forklift for a zamboni, and he refused to admit his mistake and forced the crew to use it until the forklift was encased in ice and the rink’s surface was too rutted and rough for skates and the visiting teams started bringing hobnail boots to wear instead?” He twirled the nunchuks faster, shaking his head. “Anyway, yeah. You’re like him.”
“Stay away from my kids,” I said, taking a step toward him.
I heard a faint ‘thwip’ noise and felt the sting of a dart in my neck. Then another. The plush yetis were spitting them. I staggered.
“Just lie down” Jason advised. “The trank in those things has a kick on it like a mule.”
bonus points for using them in reverse order