Oh, It’s Too Confusing

During October we will be sharing passages that we’ve written independently from the same prompt.

• Oh, it’s too confusing
• The hell I am
• his cranium was large
• particularly the gas attack
• hastily procured a saucer of milk and one of sardines
• Can you use it to pay taxes?

Jen’s Take

His cranium was large, some might say overlarge, due to several instances in his early childhood, particularly the gas attack. Unfortunately that giant melon did not house an equally over-sized intellect.

“Oh, it’s too confusing,” he said of the internet. “Can you use it to pay taxes?”

I sighed. He always got dumber when he was hungry. I hastily procured a saucer of milk and one of sardines as well, in hopes of staving off further degeneration of his intellectual faculties.

“We’ll talk about that in a minute,” I said, “But first you’re going to eat this nice snack.”

“The hell I am,” he replied belligerently. “Not unless you make it a smoothie.”

 

Kent’s Take

“Oh, it’s too confusing,” Felix sighed. His cranium was large, but mostly filled with styrofoam peanuts. Consequently, there were few things that did not confuse him. A 1040-ez lay far outside of his area of proficiency.

“You’re making too much of a fuss,” Felicity replied.

“The hell I am,” Felix growled back.

“Just follow your instincts. You know you have the poise of a panther.”

“I do? Can you use it to pay taxes?”

“Here, stay put and take slow, calming breaths.” Felicity dashed to the kitchen and hastily procured a saucer of milk and one of sardines. Upon her return she said, “These will help you concentrate.”

Felix lapped at the milk dubiously, and swerved away from the sardines altogether. But he had to admit that his mind responded to the unconventional tonic. Soon it filled with visions for how to cope with the IRS, visions Felix found invigorating – particularly the gas attack.

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