John Got Down on His Knees
Just smile and wave, guys. Just smile and wave.- Wombat herds?
- inevitably got molasses on their shoes
- “Is your throat lined with copper?”
- used the expression “off the chain”
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John got down on his knees and pulled a magnet out of his pajama pocket. As he ran it over the surface of the ice he explained that it was controlling switches frozen deep inside.
Suddenly Mr Carousel skidded up beside me. “I’m so glad you’ve reconsidered! We at the Royal Contrarian Icecapades can’t wait to have you as our featured performer!” He nodded at John. “You and your friend can skate together as a pairs act, and at the end during the rapturous applause, you know what you do?” He waggled his eyebrows impressively. “Just smile and wave, guys. Just smile and wave. The crowds will love you! Soon you’ll be swimming in cash, and sportszeppelins, and wombat herds!”
John looked up eagerly. “Wombat herds?” He’d always wanted a wombat. A whole herd of them might prove as irresistible as honeyed pancakes. I couldn’t let him be distracted now.
“You know what happened to all the Academy’s wombat herders, John,” I said. “They inevitably got molasses on their shoes. You don’t want that, do you?”
He got a dreamy look in his eye and completely forgot about his magnet-fiddling. “But… their little squishy faces! They’re so fuzzy!”
“Have you forgotten about the pancakes?” demanded Fleur. “Is your throat lined with copper?” Her ferocious tone pulled him back from his wombat stupor. “Restart this airship immediately. Later you can ice skate with marsupials. I have never used the expression “off the chain”, but it will be that.” She glared at him with her fiery blue eyes. “Restart. The. Engines.”
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