Rune Skelley novels tend to contain quite a bit of sex. How graphic it is, and how kinky, depends on the project. Not all stories call for any, and the decisions about where to draw the line on details are for each author to make for themselves. Like anything else that happens to your characters, though, it should be rendered convincingly.

It’d be too easy to drop in a joke here about writing what you know. Joking aside, how does any of us really know what sex is like from the other side? (In the case of gay relationships, the “other” side isn’t any different. So this post doesn’t really apply.) A female character should approach romantic or hedonistic situations from a fundamentally feminine viewpoint, while a male character’s viewpoint on such matters should be informed by a different set of factors. We’re all familiar with general stereotypical differences between men and women; falling back on those tropes will probably just distance readers from your characters. But there are real, honest differences. You want your characters to exist as individuals, complete persons of whom gender is only part of their makeup. You need to give them honest feelings and desires, not the flimsy sham of a cliché.

Writing with a partner who happens to be of the opposite gender offers a chance to explore intimacy and physical pleasure more fully (at least on the page). But if you and that partner aren’t comfortable being frank with each other about the experience of sex, then it’s probably best to focus on stories that don’t call for it. That would also be true if we replaced “sex” with “politics” or “religion.” If talking about the issue would involve incessant giggling or reliance on euphemisms, then you’re not ready to write together about it.