I Threw a Glance at the Closed Door
good-natured patience and gentle eye-rolling- embedded into the skin
- it sounds insane
- he never intended to record it himself
- so predictably ritualistic
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I threw a glance at the closed door to the ultrasound room where my wife and her sister presumably still were, getting high as fuck on those funky smoked mushrooms. That couldn’t be good for the babies, could it?
I kept my hand over my mouth to make sure I didn’t ask that question out loud.
When I looked back at my one-time prom date I found her full of good-natured patience and gentle eye-rolling, which was disconcerting since she had metal spikes embedded into the skin of her eyelids that stuck out like armored eyelashes. I know it sounds insane, but Myxolemia always had a flair for the dramatic.
“The president sent me,” Myxolemia said in response to my questioning look. “I’m the ambassador to Contraria these days. Thor wanted me to deliver a message, but he never intended to record it himself.” She handed me a thumb drive in the shape of an actual human thumb. “Freya did it for him.”
I wondered which of my siblings had truly sent this mysterious message, and why any of them would be taking an interest in my fate at this late date.
Myxolemia held out her hand. I fished in my pocket and gave her a §12 coin. She rolled her eyes less gently and I remembered that in Contraria it is customary to tip an ambassador with a song. Everything in this damn country is so predictably ritualistic! Right down to how many verses I was to sing, based on the social importance of the message’s sender, and which foot I was to stand on while I sang.
I did the calculations, took a deep breath, lifted my right foot, and began.
bonus points for using them in order