I had Loved Tessa for Years
by the time I reached my adolescence- just a feather duster for company
- of hazy European origin
- hands moving upwards
- took turns holding crowns above their heads
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I had loved Tessa for years and years. By the time I reached my adolescence‘s midpoint I was infatuated with her, and the feeling had never fully abated. Never mind that she once locked me in the janitor’s closet with just a feather duster for company. Never mind that she’d kissed my brother, that she’d been engaged to John — perhaps still was! Never mind that I was married to Fleur (And Hildegard. And Chartreuse Pamplemousse.), and had an uncountable number of children, many of them with her sisters. Never mind all of it. Over the past few minutes I had become sure that this was the real Tessa, and there was nothing I wouldn’t do for her. Before the person in the corridor could enter my quarters, I leapt from the bed and flung the door open. I was counting on the element of surprise, and there was definitely a lot of it, I just didn’t expect to be the one who was most surprised.
“Put some pants on,” said Zeus Pamplemousse. “Or don’t.” He strode into my chamber like a magician taking the stage, his black velvet cloak swooshing dramatically. Tessa stared at him, openmouthed.
Everyone knew about Zeus Pamplemousse, but few people had ever met him. He first rose to fame (or infamy) when he participated in a ceremony of hazy European origin wherein he and his wife Blanchisseuse kept their hands moving upwards and downwards at all times, and took turns holding crowns above their heads, after which they declared themselves the sovereigns of the moon.
And now the Moon King — perhaps my father-in-law — was on my wife’s airship, and I was naked. This had to be a massive breach of protocol.
bonus points for using them in order