I Expected A Reappearance
are you referring to the caps lock button?- used his fingertips
- with a straight face
- married 11 times to 9 different men
- didn’t know as much about anatomy as he believed he did
Tune in next time part 294 Click Here for Earlier Installments
I expected a reappearance of the bizarre creature who’d croaked at us about the ritual, but what arose from the mud pool this time was even stranger. It was like a Mesoamerican snake deity, and the metallic purple plumage crowning its enormous head came up clean, as if the thick muck it came from didn’t even exist.
“You called tech support?” it inquired of Tessa.
“Yeah, and I’ve been waiting forever for someone to get back to me. There’s a problem with my control interface.”
“Are you referring to the caps lock button?”
“No I’m not talking about the fucking caps lock. Look at these doofuses. I’ve been trying for weeks to get this debugged but it just keeps getting weirder.”
The serpentine technician revealed himself to possess arms, and hands with uncannily flexible digits. He used his fingertips to trace circles in the air, like he was drawing glasses and mustaches on me and Jason. He couldn’t do it with a straight face, and his fangs glinted in the dim light.
He turned back to Tessa. “Look, I’m going to need to escalate this to a level three tech. And my supervisor is unreachable at the moment, but she’s been married 11 times to 9 different men and two incarnations of lustful malice, so there’s no telling when she might come to the office to approve this. So you might be on your own here. Might be easier to just credit your account.” With a glance my way he added, “That one will probably come up with what you want, eventually. Assuming its tail is prehensile.”
And, thus proving he didn’t know as much about anatomy as he believed he did, the creature vanished beneath the mud.
bonus points for using them in order