Hildegard Didn’t Care
Not like a sumo wrestler.- “Good god, man, are you insane?”
- a wolf in girl’s clothing
- most guys’ crotches are stank factories
- merry, nearly nude traipse through life
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Hildegard didn’t care what risks our marriage would pose to me, but I did. I had no desire to find out how Fleur would react. Hildegard wasn’t going to listen to reason, while her father showed no capacity for it. But that might give me my way out.
I turned to the old man. “Your lovely daughter here wants to marry me, as you know.”
“Yes! A son of Zeus Pamplemousse! With a mind like a falcon and a heart like a sumo wrestler!”
“Well, my heart is… Not like a sumo wrestler. In fact, I’m not a son of Zeus Pamplemousse. And Hildegard knows it.”
The codger squinted up at me. “Good god, man, are you insane?” He lowered his voice. “Play along, if you know what’s good for you. My daughter is a wolf in girl’s clothing who’s looking for a mate. Since most guys’ crotches are stank factories she’s being picky. I don’t blame her. And you shouldn’t resist. Just smile, and nod, and in another few days you can set out on a merry, nearly nude traipse through life (if you don’t mind a little frostbite).”
bonus points for using them in order