Having My Numerous Offspring
Talk about awkward…- long blond hair unbound and disastrously tangled
- soda was the dominant aroma
- — after the fly incident
- a muffin pan is ideal
Tune in next time part 832 Click Here for Earlier Installments
Having my numerous offspring in the same room with Bruce Pamplemousse was unacceptable, that much I knew. The chaos in the auditorium was making it difficult to think, to come up with a plan of action to correct the problem. It would also make it all but impossible to wrangle all the children.
A flash of inspiration struck. Unlike my children, Bruce Pamplemousse was not numerous. So all I had to do was get him out of the room. Despite his reputation, he might have cooperated with a polite request. Only I’d shouted at him and spoiled his tacky performance. Talk about awkward…
Bruce tugged off the bald pate that was part of his baby costume, leaving his long blond hair unbound and disastrously tangled. Drops of sweat flew from the rubbery headpiece, and I was pleasantly surprised to discover that orange soda was the dominant aroma thus released. He also shed the diaper, revealing the skimpiest cutoffs I had ever seen. It amazed me that Bruce would wear them — after the fly incident of a few years ago that trapped him for two days in a pair of jeans with a frozen zipper.
He was zeroing in on me as he advanced to the lip of the stage. I wished I had some implement with which I could deflect punches and accomplish nonlethal subdual (a muffin pan is ideal for close-quarters combat, FYI). But my sweat-soaked scientist costume did not include anything suitable.
bonus points for using them in order