“Get On With It!”
- Character – morose existentialist
- Setting – rowboat
- Object – bottle of champagne, box of saltines, jar of caviar, bag of pork rinds, candy cane
- Situation – first day at the new job
“Get on with it!” Vernon’s irritation had overflowed the vessel he kept it in, and he shouted everything he said. “Launch the goddamn boat!”
Maurice grasped the neck of the magnum of Dom Perignon, half-lidded eyes directed at the prow of the boat. The “Cygnet” rested in dry dock awaiting her maiden voyage. This morning, Maurice had begun his new job of christening each new vessel assembled by Barking Brothers’ Boatworks, and this twelve-foot rowboat would be his third launch.
The Vice-Presidents of Sales and Operations sat aboard the Cygnet, eating caviar on saltines, while Vernon Barking munched pork rinds and Vincent Barking sucked a candy cane.
“Smash the bottle!” Vernon screamed, showering all with porcine crumbs.
Maurice sighed. “Are not all our moments like the christening of a ship? Each breath, an uncertain endeavor in what could be a leaky deathtrap?”
He swung the bottle listlessly and jolted the Cygnet from her moorings, and she capsized amid the shrieks of corporate executives.
This one made me giggle :-)
Hmmm. I only made her giggle. Do I at least get a ribbon?
You totally get a ribbon!