Fernando Was Not
- It gave birth
- Negligence and so forth
- the three-trailer-long house
- wrapped in brown paper
- He was almost bald
- And fell and fell and fell.
- shaped like a Hershey’s Kiss or a woman’s breast
Fernando was not an attractive man. He was almost bald, for one thing. To disguise his naked scalp, he kept it wrapped in brown paper which made it seem shaped like a Hershey’s Kiss or a woman’s breast.
Fernando spent most of his time alone in the three-trailer-long house he called his Triplex of Solitude. It was three Airstream campers welded together.
Fernando’s days were spent daydreaming about hot celebrities he saw on the internet. His favorite fantasy was about how Angelina Jolie fell in love with him. And fell and fell and fell. She would parade around the Triplex, in Fernando’s fevered imaginings, wearing skimpy underwear. “Negligence and so forth,” he murmured.
Fernando was also not very bright.
His musings were interrupted one day by his pet turtle. It gave birth.