“Explain,” I Said

  • by KentI’d already drugged the cat
  • so secret she won’t shut up about them
  • Ramekins, not plates.
  • angle of his eyebrows
  • (or any yellow bird)

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“Explain,” I said.

“Nuptials fall within the scope of Royal Decree,” Tessa said. “And owing to the Diplomatic Reformation of 1528, Lunar royalty in particular can issue such decrees ‘anyplace the moon has been full.’ That provision is really meant to protect the rights of werewolves and other lycanthropes, but… it’s a loophole that applies to this situation.”

“There must be some loopholes for you to exploit as well!”

Tessa shook her head. “I mean, yes, there would be if he hadn’t closed them all. I had been counting on using the Newmar Exemption.”

“But I’d already drugged the cat,” Pamplemousse said smugly. “Oh yes, I am well versed in all the secret legal trapdoors, so secret she won’t shut up about them in her sleep.”

“What?!” I roared.

“He planted listening devices,” Tessa said reassuringly. “There was one behind each of the commemorative plates on my headboard.”

Pamplemousse frowned. “Ramekins, not plates.” This felt like a picayune detail to create so much intensity in the angle of his eyebrows.

“So anyway,” Tessa said with a sigh, “I’m his wife now. But that doesn’t mean I have to go and live with him or anything. It’s just a technicality. I’m as free as a canary (or any yellow bird).”

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