Dr Ferguson Was Not, Of Course, Her Real Name
check for ears- his chest seemed to thrill and quiver
- his engine had an anti-siphon valve
- “You ate that whole dang cake, baby!”
- first-ever moose lottery
Tune in next time part 648 Click Here for Earlier Installments
Dr Ferguson was not, of course, her real name. I did not know her real name — no one did — but I knew she was no protegé of Chartreuse Pamplemousse. She’d been one of the silent, nameless attendants within the warren of tunnels at the Academy known as the Nurse’s Office. The Nurse himself was a radical freethinker, and he compelled his assistants to devise bizarre procedures to use on the students. So-called Dr Ferguson had been the one to invent a vision check for ears.
“My hearing’s still 20/20,” I muttered. Her smile widened and she followed me out into the hallway. “Glad to see you escaped that lunatic, the Nurse.”
“He was misunderstood,” she replied, her expression darkening. “At each new discovery, his chest seemed to thrill and quiver, like he was a jet ski and his engine had an anti-siphon valve with a cracked flange. I was lucky for the chance to gather crumbs of his knowledge.”
I laughed. “You ate that whole dang cake, baby!” Her smile returned, so I supposed I hadn’t offended her too badly. “Maybe we can help each other out,” I pressed. “Right now I’m mainly interested in getting as far as possible away from my new wife.”
She nodded. “Come with me. I have a ride waiting.”
In the parking lot, she led me to a gigantic beast with antlers seven feet across. She patted my shoulder. “Here’s where I need your help. I just won him in Bumpengrynd’s first-ever moose lottery, and haven’t gained his trust.”
bonus points for using them in order