Category: Stichomancy Prompts

Sally Was No Longer Certain

  • k-avatarHow observant the females
  • slipping cautiously into the mist
  • wrong end first, only compounded the confusion
  • letting her own need flower
  • exclamations crowded her brain
  • overhanging the poop deck
  • a rumbling chuckle ruffled her curls

Sally was no longer certain she should have come on the voyage, and the sight of Alphonse’s vessel slipping cautiously into the mist, wrong end first, only compounded the confusion in her mind. She raised the spyglass, leaning far out over the railing overhanging the poop deck, but the heavy mist made the instrument useless. Alphonse and his ship had vanished.

A rumbling chuckle ruffled her curls, and she cursed the rat-sneak who styled himself captain of this tub, but not aloud. He had an eerie way of sneaking up behind her. “What’s so funny?” she demanded.

“How observant the females, and still, ah, vot is the word…” the grizzled Russian stared off into the ice-choked distance. “Stupid. Yes.”

Exclamations crowded her brain, and Sally’s eyes widened, but she checked her indignant reply.

“I brought you nice coat. Sealskin and arctic fox.”

Sally hadn’t felt cold, too intent on Alphonse’s fate, but now realized she was shivering violently. Hating herself for accepting anything from the vile captain, she reached for the garment and greedily shrugged into it. The captain chuckled again.

Sally hid her tears in fox fur. Alphonse had been content back home on the farm, but she had needed an adventurous man. And now she stood here, freezing, alone, sorry for letting her own need flower into her beloved’s doom.

 

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

Inez Claims to be Spanish

  • by jenhis Austrian cannon
  • lights a small cheroot for herself
  • sexuality is the key
  • that should relieve her boredom
  • Inez claims to be Spanish
  • so many homosexuals of both kinds

Inez claims to be Spanish, but no one believes her, even when she lights a small cheroot for herself and affects a heavy accent.

Inez is bored. She has spent the day surrounded by so many homosexuals of both kinds. Heterosexuality is the key that should relieve her boredom.

Luckily Hans enters the dance club just then. Inez smiles, thinking of his Austrian cannon.

 

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

Harry Would Always Try Like Hell

  • k-avatartry like hell to tailor
  • it would look like a slump
  • theoretical mathematical inherent possibility
  • flight only smaller cats
  • $2000

Harry would always try like hell to tailor his advice to the particular needs of the recipient.

“Fight only smaller cats,” he recommended to the scratched and bedraggled dachshund. Not fighting at all would generally be better advice, but a weiner-dog has to think about the standings. It would look like a slump if he didn’t notch any victories.

“Go for it,” he called up to the woman on the ledge. To the aghast bystanders all around, he said, “She might float down slowly and be fine. It’s a theoretical mathematical inherent possibility.”

Every time Harry’s prescription ran out, he enjoyed at least a day of such lucidity and wisdom. And to think, he thought, I spent $2000 on those pills!

 

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

The Fee For Government Burial

  • by jenas smoking tears poured from his eyes
  • my mother was alive then
  • one extraterrestrial humanoid
  • furtive-faced little man in an oversize raincoat
  • The fee for government burial is ten dollars
  • with cars, refrigerators, a castle in Scotland

“The fee for government burial is ten dollars,” said the furtive-faced little man in an oversize raincoat as smoking tears poured from his eyes and he exposed himself.

“Let me give you some advice,” Carlo said, “one extraterrestrial humanoid to another. Keep that thing covered or the earthmen will know that you’re not just an eccentric rich man with cars, refrigerators, a castle in Scotland, and all the rest.”

“Sorry,” said the furtive-faced little man. “In my grief I forget myself.”

“Surely you can afford the ten dollar fee,” said Carlo.

“I used to wealthy, years ago,” said the man, “but my mother was alive then. When she died, our money was cremated along with her body. And now I cannot even afford the government fee to bury my monkey.”

Feeling sympathy, Carlo slipped the man a tenner.

 

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

“Rude Drivers. They Kill People.”

  • k-avatara man in a white spacesuit
  • the greedy bastards
  • workers washing their boots
  • the pilots had been drinking
  • They kill people
  • code word to alert the bodyguard

“Rude drivers. They kill people.”

Steve returned to his magazine, hoping to read in peace until take-off. A man in a white spacesuit had the seat beside him, and seemed determined to pry into Steve’s reasons for everything, up to and including his choice of air travel over the highway.

As he read an article about workers washing their boots as part of a work stoppage, the greedy bastards striking for more pay and more days off, Steve heard a commotion in first class. Some celebrity and his whole entourage were trying to leave the cabin, the spoiled celeb calling out “guacamole!” over and over.

It must have been a code word to alert the bodyguard that the pilots had been drinking.

 

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

The Latest Album From My Favorite Band

  • by jenthe Danish East Asia Company
  • emitted a ghostly hiss
  • suicides and bankruptcies
  • the rain poured down
  • with Mussolini making speeches

The latest album from my favorite band, The Danish East Asia Company, emitted a ghostly hiss as it started to play through my headphones. The hiss built into a lush, haunting melody and the lyrics told a story of suicides and bankruptcies as the rain poured down in my ears. The next track was angrier, with Mussolini making speeches in Italian in the samples they had chosen to construct the complex beat.

 

bonus points for using them in order!

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

“Abigail! Bad Dog!”

  • k-avatarthe seven battalions of the Lepracaun
  • rent all her needlework asunder
  • made a merry, scornful sound
  • the princess’s spaniel
  • “Hop! Hop!” he cried

“Abigail! Bad dog!” exclaimed Princess Flamisham after Abigail, the princess’s spaniel, made a merry, scornful sound and rent all her needlework asunder.

But soon the princess marveled at her pet’s alertness, for revealed beneath the ruined coverlet were the tiny General Shamrock and the seven battalions of the Lepracaun.

“Good dog, Abigail! Sic ’em!”

Shamrock issued commands in a frenzy, hoping to avoid a total massacre. “Hop! Hop!” he cried.

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

Andrew Lloyd Webber Read the Theater Reviews

  • by jenthey’ve ruined my show
  • sang the last line of the song
  • that fateful morning
  • no one mocked his old lady voice
  • you are so flamboyantly much
  • hung from hooks

Andrew Lloyd Webber read the theater reviews with a sinking heart that fateful morning.

“They’ve ruined my show!” he cried.

“You are so flamboyantly much more important in your own mind than you are in the real world,” goaded his daughter Catherine.

Andrew looked at her and noticed for the first time that tiny wooden fish hung from hooks in her ears.

Catherine grabbed the paper and read the most scathing lines of the review out loud. “Gary Sinise was not the best choice for the role of Grandma Kittywhiskers. I’d like to say no one mocked his old lady voice, but I can’t. The crowd erupted in giggles repeatedly, most notably at the end of ‘Crazy Cat Lady Blues’ when he sang the last line of the song a cappella.”

Andrew hung his head in shame.

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

Stewart Left His Crowbar

  • k-avatarleft his crowbar
  • it is a machine
  • fish taco
  • tragic, funny, sexy, hilarious
  • hair in his fast

Stewart left his crowbar tangled in Myrtle’s hair in his fast getaway from the scene. He hoped she wouldn’t follow him again, that this was the last time he’d have to kill her.

He ran into the nearest bar, desperate to warn the occupants. “In a few minutes, a crazy lady will come in here. But it is not a lady. It is a machine. A tragic, funny, sexy, hilarious machine.” Other than a few chuckles, he got no reaction from the career drinkers. Stewart slunk to a deserted, shadowy corner to think.

Sure enough, Myrtle entered moments later, still trailing the crowbar.

Oh god, Stewart moaned, open mic night.

Myrtle mounted the stage, the heavy steel rod clanking with each step. She leaned up to the microphone and sighed, “What has two eyes, a tail, no legs, and hot sauce?” Stewart gulped. The spell was cast.

In one voice the rest of the patrons said, “A fish taco.”

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!

Ed Attended the Matinee Performance

  • by jenEd combed the circus
  • like dead men’s knuckles
  • a boiled egg rolled away
  • the unlucky and the morally dyslexic
  • came up to his armpits
  • a small pudgy thing with a huge curved bone

Ed attended the matinee performance of the Circus of the Unlucky and the Morally Dyslexic and had the misfortune to be pulled out of the audience by one of the clowns, a small pudgy thing with a huge curved bone through his nose, and a rainbow wig. The skit he was shanghaied into ended with the audience roaring, and Ed buried in a pile of food that came up to his armpits and soiled his new souvenir t-shirt while a boiled egg rolled away and was trampled by a miniature pony. Its crackling shell made a noise like dead men’s knuckles.

A female clown led Ed backstage to get cleaned up, and they began a passionate affair. Every evening after the final performance, Ed combed the circus girl’s hair in a display of affection.

about stichomancy writing prompts

try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!