Agent Smedley Raised the Collar of his Trench Coat
Character – inept hacker- Setting – world’s most inappropriate McDonald’s
- Object – nail gun
- Situation – midlife crisis
Agent Smedley raised the collar of his trench coat, shot a shifty glance up the hill to see if he was being watched, and ducked into the restaurant. He queued for his ultra-fatty burger and deep-fried potatoes.
The vibrant yellow insignia that had led him here stood in garish contrast to the centuries-old stones of the fortification that housed the establishment. Mere steps from the site of royal decapitations, amid the grand murk of the Tower and its veil of history, lurked a hive of incipient obesity and totem of the very rebellious colonists who repudiated this empire.
Smedley surveyed his fellow diners, alert for anyone else who seemed to be looking for someone. His contact had said, “Meet me at the world’s most inappropriate McDonald’s,” and this had to be the place.
It was Smedley’s turn. He looked at the person awaiting his order, and saw that his piercing gaze was being shrewdly returned. He smiled.
“Deep-fry me a nail gun,” he muttered.
“This job is just part of my midlife crisis,” responded the young man in the polyester hat. He slid a tray across the counter, and Smedley noted an excessively printed order slip. He nodded and took the empty tray to an equally empty table.
He read the slip. He shook his head. Although there was lots of jargon about firewalls and encryption, all the strip of paper really told him was that he’d been outbid for the clock he really liked on eBay.
This, this is brilliant.
Thank you. I don’t know what else to say to such a compliment!
I’ve actually been to the “world’s most inappropriate McDonald’s” — I assume it’s still there, but my visit was 13 years ago. Sadly, no one gave me the countersign so my fast-food espionage gambit was a bust.
Counter-intelligence must have weeded out your inside connection…