Proper Use of Aluminum Foil
“I just wanted to say bon voyage, darling.”- someone involved in the circus
- an excuse to rub it all over you
- his handheld computer
- after the whole hippo’s foot incident
Tune in next time part 912 Click Here for Earlier Installments
Proper use of aluminum foil had become a small obsession of mine after the whole hippo’s foot incident. Let’s just say clearing customs that day was a major headache, as the inspector scrolled endlessly on his handheld computer in search of the proper import duty on such an item. He finally gave up only when I told him, “This will give me time to bring in the rest of the animal, and think up an excuse to rub it all over you.” He found an exemption that could be applied if I were someone involved in the circus industry, which according to my phony papers I was. Due to the delay, I had to race through the airport to make my next connection, and then the customs inspector appeared again to bar my way. I thought he’d discovered my false paperwork, or finally tracked down the amount I was supposed to pay. He seized me in his arms, and I was convinced he was arresting me, but then he whispered in my ear, “I just wanted to say bon voyage, darling.” He slipped me a note, which I read on the plane. Turned out he had a fetish for being slathered with exotic cuts of meat.
None of which I would have ever had to know if only the parcel had been wrapped more effectively. I took the lesson very much to heart and practiced religiously until I could encase almost anything in a smooth, gleaming cube of foil. I’d never before tried to do a room, though.
bonus points for using them in reverse order