{"id":8743,"date":"2022-08-15T08:22:56","date_gmt":"2022-08-15T12:22:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/?p=8743"},"modified":"2022-08-13T15:56:41","modified_gmt":"2022-08-13T19:56:41","slug":"people-often-dont-believe-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/people-often-dont-believe-me\/","title":{"rendered":"People Often Don&#8217;t Believe Me"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-13\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/j-avatar-e1443983489508.png\" alt=\"by jen\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>sinister to the core<\/li>\n<li>the monkey and the plywood violin<\/li>\n<li>\u201cWhat a fucking clich\u00e9,\u201d<\/li>\n<li>skittering across the ice<\/li>\n<li>\u201cDo you suffer from sea sickness?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Tune in next time part 721 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/tune-in-next-time\/\">Click Here for Earlier Installments<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>People often don&#8217;t believe me when I say that my mother is <em>sinister to the core<\/em>. They mention my numerous siblings and how joyful a large family is, they remember my fifth birthday party, when she hired the man with <em>the monkey and the plywood violin<\/em> to entertain us, and how idyllic that meant my childhood must have been. They ignore the stories of marital strife with my father, of early childhood espionage training exercises, of her highly questionable acts as president.\u00a0<em>&#8220;What a fucking clich\u00e9,&#8221;<\/em> they say. &#8220;Everyone has mommy issues.&#8221; Well, my mommy issues were <em>skittering across the ice<\/em> of an airborne hockey rink, intent on starting a war.<\/p>\n<p><em>&#8220;Do you suffer from sea sickness?&#8221;<\/em> she asked me with mock sympathy. &#8220;Your face is awfully green.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>bonus points for using them in order<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>sinister to the core the monkey and the plywood violin \u201cWhat a fucking clich\u00e9,\u201d skittering across the ice \u201cDo you suffer from sea sickness?\u201d Tune in next time part 721 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0Click Here for Earlier Installments People often don&#8217;t believe me when I say that my mother is sinister to the core. They mention [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[91,419,403,486],"class_list":["post-8743","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-bonus-points","tag-mother","tag-tune-in-next-time","tag-zeppelin"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8743","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8743"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8743\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8750,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8743\/revisions\/8750"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8743"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8743"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8743"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}