{"id":8704,"date":"2022-07-25T08:33:39","date_gmt":"2022-07-25T12:33:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/?p=8704"},"modified":"2022-07-25T22:36:59","modified_gmt":"2022-07-26T02:36:59","slug":"mothers-temper-should-not-have-surprised-john","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/mothers-temper-should-not-have-surprised-john\/","title":{"rendered":"Mother&#8217;s Temper Should Not Have Surprised John"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-13\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/j-avatar-e1443983489508.png\" alt=\"by jen\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>I come from the land of plenty<\/li>\n<li>the slimy creature refusing to budge<\/li>\n<li>Do you not think something\u2019s missing, brother?<\/li>\n<li>prioritizing your coital carnival<\/li>\n<li>gold-painted, life-size statue of his voluptuous wife<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Tune in next time part 715 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/tune-in-next-time\/\">Click Here for Earlier Installments<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Mother&#8217;s temper should not have surprised John, and while it is quite frightful, I would expect a seasoned espionage agent like him to have more intestinal fortitude. The sight of my nemesis with a load in his ceremonial jammies ought to make me smile, but instead it made me wary. What exactly had Mother done to him?<\/p>\n<p>Through the escape pod door I heard her say, &#8220;<em>I come from the land of Plenty<\/em>lvania, a descendent of the royal line. I can&#8217;t believe I&#8217;m married to <em>the slimy creature refusing to budge<\/em> from this escape pod and fix his error.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Mother a Plentylvanian? The idea was shocking. And yet&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>I remembered working on a family tree project with Jason, tracing our line back many generations on Father&#8217;s side. Mother&#8217;s side was starkly empty. &#8220;<em>Do you not think something&#8217;s missing brother?<\/em>&#8221; Jason asked. Now it all fell into place. Plentylvania was a small country, completely surrounded by (and always at war with) Svenborgia.<\/p>\n<p>The escape pod door slid open and Mother confronted me. &#8220;I couldn&#8217;t help but witness your parade of children. It&#8217;s clear that you were <em>prioritizing your coital carnival<\/em> instead of countersurveilling John like you were ordered to do.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;None of this is my fault,&#8221; I insisted. &#8220;Get out here, John, and restart the engines.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;All I ever wanted,&#8221; whined John, &#8220;was to be the kind of guy who had a <em>gold-painted, life-size statue of his voluptuous wife<\/em> in his office, and now I&#8217;m going to die in a zeppelin.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Not if you restart the engines.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;And stop pissing off your wife,&#8221; Mother added.<\/p>\n<p>bonus points for using them in order<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I come from the land of plenty the slimy creature refusing to budge Do you not think something\u2019s missing, brother? prioritizing your coital carnival gold-painted, life-size statue of his voluptuous wife Tune in next time part 715 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0Click Here for Earlier Installments Mother&#8217;s temper should not have surprised John, and while it is [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[91,500,403,486],"class_list":["post-8704","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-bonus-points","tag-poop","tag-tune-in-next-time","tag-zeppelin"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8704","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8704"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8704\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8707,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8704\/revisions\/8707"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8704"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8704"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8704"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}