{"id":6297,"date":"2019-03-18T08:36:21","date_gmt":"2019-03-18T12:36:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/?p=6297"},"modified":"2019-03-17T14:12:52","modified_gmt":"2019-03-17T18:12:52","slug":"you-need-a-hat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/you-need-a-hat\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;You Need a Hat&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-13\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/j-avatar-e1443983489508.png\" alt=\"by jen\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>with a turned-up nose, and rather turned-in legs<\/li>\n<li>got to the edge of a very big wood<\/li>\n<li>Oh God, Paul. Elevators!<\/li>\n<li>a circular muddy mark<\/li>\n<li>We can have the ceremony at once<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Tune in next time part 371 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/tune-in-next-time\/\">Click Here for Earlier Installments<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;You need a hat,&#8221; Fleur said. &#8220;Contrarian generals always have hats.&#8221; She deftly folded her white linen napkin into an origami hat that rather resembled a paper boat. &#8220;Perfect!&#8221; She held it aloft. &#8220;<em>We can have the ceremony at once<\/em>.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;But a white hat,&#8221; said Harry. &#8220;Surely not.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Quiet, Harry,&#8221; Fleur said. &#8220;You&#8217;re just upset because my husband will outrank you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Harry pouted froggily under Isolde&#8217;s doting gaze.<\/p>\n<p>Fleur directed me to kneel, plopped the napkin hat on my head, and used coffee grounds to make<em> a circular muddy mark<\/em> on my lapel. &#8220;This insignia shows your rank, General. Congratulations.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I bowed my head to kiss her hand, careful not to let my hat slip off. I felt rather ridiculous in my new getup, like a country bumpkin arriving in the big city for the first time. The type of rube who would be amazed by the most mundane things. &#8220;<em>Oh God, Paul. Elevators!<\/em> Like in the movies!&#8221; That sort of thing.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Ooo Harry!&#8221; Isolde cooed. &#8220;You should buy your commanding officer a drink!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>With a prodigious scowl, Harry stood from the table and marched across the restaurant until he <em>got to the edge of a very big wood<\/em>en bar that was on the opposite side of the fountain from where we were seated. He returned shortly <em>with a turned-up nose, and rather turned-in legs<\/em> that accentuated his toad-like qualities. With a curt salute he handed me a tall glass full of a frothy green substance. It didn&#8217;t smell like anything I&#8217;d ever encountered before. Could I trust that he wasn&#8217;t trying to poison me?<\/p>\n<p>bonus points for using them in reverse order<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>with a turned-up nose, and rather turned-in legs got to the edge of a very big wood Oh God, Paul. Elevators! a circular muddy mark We can have the ceremony at once Tune in next time part 371 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0Click Here for Earlier Installments &#8220;You need a hat,&#8221; Fleur said. &#8220;Contrarian generals always have [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[91,341,16,403],"class_list":["post-6297","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-bonus-points","tag-clothes","tag-effervescent-concoction","tag-tune-in-next-time"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6297","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6297"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6297\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6300,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6297\/revisions\/6300"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6297"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6297"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6297"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}