{"id":5609,"date":"2018-05-02T08:28:12","date_gmt":"2018-05-02T12:28:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/?p=5609"},"modified":"2018-04-30T22:08:46","modified_gmt":"2018-05-01T02:08:46","slug":"easy-pal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/easy-pal\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Easy, Pal&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-24\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/k-avatar-e1443983846496.png\" alt=\"by Kent\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>shall find its way into the pockets<\/li>\n<li>twenty people on the lawn. With guns.<\/li>\n<li>lay upon his belly beside a limpid brook<\/li>\n<li>pull at me with her little hands<\/li>\n<li>spread by a bug sprayer<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Tune in next time part 280 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<b>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<\/b><\/strong><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/tune-in-next-time\/\">Click Here for Earlier Installments<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Easy, pal,&#8221; I said. &#8220;Nobody needs to get kicked.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Untrue! A remark not in accordance with the facts (read: a fib). Much kicking is needed, which you know full well, ere a farthing of my wealth <em>shall find its way into the pockets<\/em> of your taskmasters.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Who do you think I am?&#8221; I looked at Tesla, who hadn&#8217;t stirred. I hoped she was okay, but hoped she remained unconscious long enough to be spared the vile atmosphere of the sewer.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Oh I know just who you are. You&#8217;re chemtrails. You&#8217;re Project Bluebook. You&#8217;re <em>twenty people on the lawn. With guns.<\/em>&#8221; He thrust out his palms. &#8220;In Dallas? The motorcade? That&#8217;s you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Ah, guess you&#8217;re on to me,&#8221; I mumbled, hoping that humoring him would work better than arguing. &#8220;But that was a long time ago. People change.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>But he turned away from me on the boat ramp, and then, as though he <em>lay upon his belly beside a limpid brook<\/em> in a sun-drenched meadow, he lay on his belly on the slimy boat ramp and reached out over the surface of the filth to give the swan boat a shove.<\/p>\n<p>Before I knew I had moved, I was airborne en route from my boulder to the ramp. In another bound I overflew the prostrate figure in the cloak and landed in the boat. My arrival jostled Tesla severely and imparted a considerable speed boost to our elegant vessel. I sat down and started pedaling. The propeller agitated the thick fluid we sailed through, liberating and invigorating the sulfurous fumes.<\/p>\n<p>Some combination of the jostling and the horrid smell woke Tesla. She looked around, wild-eyed, and began to <em>pull at me with her little hands<\/em>. &#8220;Where are you taking me?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Um, back to the ramp? To get us out of this shit river?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;But you don&#8217;t understand,&#8221; Tesla wailed.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No argument about that.&#8221; I looked ahead and saw the man in the cloak was standing, brandishing something that looked like a wand. &#8220;Now what is he doing?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Tesla gripped my arm. &#8220;Turn us around. Stay back! There&#8217;s nothing more potent than a magic spell <em>spread by a bug sprayer<\/em>!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>bonus points for using them in order<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>shall find its way into the pockets twenty people on the lawn. With guns. lay upon his belly beside a limpid brook pull at me with her little hands spread by a bug sprayer Tune in next time part 280 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0Click Here for [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[91,403],"class_list":["post-5609","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-bonus-points","tag-tune-in-next-time"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5609","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5609"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5609\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5617,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5609\/revisions\/5617"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5609"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5609"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5609"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}