{"id":5538,"date":"2018-03-28T08:29:45","date_gmt":"2018-03-28T12:29:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/?p=5538"},"modified":"2018-03-28T10:02:30","modified_gmt":"2018-03-28T14:02:30","slug":"jorgensen-appraised-tesla-and-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/jorgensen-appraised-tesla-and-me\/","title":{"rendered":"Jorgensen Appraised Tesla and Me"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-24\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/k-avatar-e1443983846496.png\" alt=\"by Kent\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>as long as you don\u2019t drink a whole can<\/li>\n<li>could have been a small Inuit woman<\/li>\n<li>no one had heard from the governor\u2019s secretary<\/li>\n<li>Strange night!<\/li>\n<li>scattered her clothes<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Tune in next time part 270 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<b>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<\/b><\/strong><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/tune-in-next-time\/\">Click Here for Earlier Installments<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Jorgensen appraised Tesla and me, standing before him wearing nothing but smeared body paint and random, colorful tatters of exploded balloon animals. He sighed through his mustache, and said to me, &#8220;I see she&#8217;s <em>scattered her clothes<\/em> all over you. Well, &#8216;clothes.&#8217; Hmph.&#8221; He formed finger quotes by swiveling his wrists rather than flexing his digits, which just gave me one more reason to detest him.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What are you doing on my sub?&#8221; Tesla asked him.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;This again? It&#8217;s not yours anymore, not since the final hand of the tournament, when you folded at dawn. <em>Strange night!<\/em> The top seeds all fell in the first round. It was unprecedented, so much so that no one cared that <em>no one had heard from the governor&#8217;s secretary<\/em>. It didn&#8217;t help that the governor was unable to provide a stable description of her, claiming she <em>could have been a small Inuit woman<\/em> or a gum-popping blonde in spike heels. Too bad for the governor no one explained to him that those energy drinks are fine <em>as long as you don&#8217;t drink a whole can<\/em>.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Fine,&#8221; Tesla said. &#8220;What are you doing on this sub?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Piracy. Ninjacy. Alliance business, but in this case it doesn&#8217;t concern you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Jorgensen looked me in the eye, his bushy mustache insufficient to conceal the nasty smile on his face.<\/p>\n<p>bonus points for using them in reverse order<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>as long as you don\u2019t drink a whole can could have been a small Inuit woman no one had heard from the governor\u2019s secretary Strange night! scattered her clothes Tune in next time part 270 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0Click Here for Earlier Installments Jorgensen appraised Tesla [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[91,74,403],"class_list":["post-5538","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-bonus-points","tag-mustache","tag-tune-in-next-time"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5538","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5538"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5538\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5546,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5538\/revisions\/5546"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5538"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5538"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5538"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}