{"id":482,"date":"2012-10-24T08:05:21","date_gmt":"2012-10-24T12:05:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.skelleyverse.com\/?p=482"},"modified":"2014-01-04T20:54:09","modified_gmt":"2014-01-05T01:54:09","slug":"varnishing-my-study","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/varnishing-my-study\/","title":{"rendered":"Varnishing My Study"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>During October we will be sharing passages that we\u2019ve written independently from the same prompt.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>varnishing my study<\/li>\n<li>like calling a leg a &#8220;limb&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>each kill a man<\/li>\n<li>a stuffed owl<\/li>\n<li>I am still on a merry-go-round<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Kent\u2019s Take<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft  wp-image-24\" title=\"k-avatar\" alt=\"\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/k-avatar.png\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>Even after completing my hazing ritual and\u00a0<em>varnishing my study<\/em>,\u00a0<em>I am still on a merry-go-round<\/em>\u00a0of ennui, riding\u00a0<em>a stuffed owl<\/em>\u00a0of disenfranchisement, pondering why we must\u00a0<em>each kill a man<\/em>\u00a0with a harmonica to gain entry into this occult club, puzzling over whether it means the harmonica is to be the weapon or if the victim must have it on him (I covered both bases, just to play it safe), and vexed by habits of linguistic imprecision (<em>like calling a leg a &#8220;limb&#8221;<\/em>) in a world where language is already so rife with ambiguity and clouded meanings.<\/p>\n<p>One sentence = Bonus Points!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Jen\u2019s Take<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft  wp-image-13\" title=\"j-avatar\" alt=\"by jen\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/j-avatar.png\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>Johannes Van Der Oppenst\u00fcffel, the reclusive Dutch billionaire, was sponsoring a competition to choose his next bodyguard. The first task he assigned the hopefuls was to scour the grounds of his immense estate in search of <em>a stuffed owl<\/em>. Once that was accomplished, he told those who remained, &#8220;You will each travel to a foreign city and you will <em>each kill a man<\/em> named either Karl or Geoffrey. When the task is completed, you will call me with the details. And when I say &#8216;details&#8217; I mean I want you to be specific. Nothing <em>like calling a leg a &#8216;limb&#8217;<\/em> will be allowed.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Five hours later the first call came.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;<em>I am still on a merry-go-round<\/em> in the Tivoli park in Copenhagen&#8221; came the rough voice, &#8220;but Karl is dead, his head crushed by a cotton candy machine.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Excellent,&#8221; replied Johannes. &#8220;Return to Amsterdam immediately to take up your duties. You will begin by <em>varnishing my study<\/em>. If you know what I mean.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n<p>What do you think? Who handled this prompt better?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>During October we will be sharing passages that we\u2019ve written independently from the same prompt. varnishing my study like calling a leg a &#8220;limb&#8221; each kill a man a stuffed owl I am still on a merry-go-round Kent\u2019s Take Even after completing my hazing ritual and\u00a0varnishing my study,\u00a0I am still on a merry-go-round\u00a0of ennui, riding\u00a0a [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[336,91,332,295,35,88],"class_list":["post-482","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-bird","tag-bonus-points","tag-crime","tag-foreign-lands","tag-if-you-know-what-i-mean","tag-shared-prompt"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/482","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=482"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/482\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2058,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/482\/revisions\/2058"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=482"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=482"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=482"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}