{"id":370,"date":"2012-08-29T08:07:21","date_gmt":"2012-08-29T12:07:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.skelleyverse.com\/?p=370"},"modified":"2014-01-04T20:57:30","modified_gmt":"2014-01-05T01:57:30","slug":"dave-could-not","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/dave-could-not\/","title":{"rendered":"Dave Could Not Believe"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><span style=\"line-height: 16px;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright  wp-image-24\" title=\"k-avatar\" alt=\"\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/k-avatar.png\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/>a chorus of raspberries<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"line-height: 16px;\">gimme!<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"line-height: 16px;\">groped for buttons on the underside<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"line-height: 16px;\">hollow-eyed and pale<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"line-height: 16px;\">spread-eagle on the hood of the patrol cruiser<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"line-height: 16px;\">unmitigated imbecility<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div>\n<p>Dave could not believe his own <em>unmitigated imbecility<\/em>. He frowned through the windshield at the policemen, <em>hollow-eyed and pale<\/em>, from his perch <em>spread-eagle on the hood of the patrol cruiser<\/em>. He&#8217;d defeated the alarm system and picked four locks, only to get run down by the fuzz while jaywalking.<\/p>\n<p>As the money he&#8217;d dropped fluttered down the street, Dave <em>groped for buttons on the underside<\/em> of his watchband, hoping the transition to a universe where he could be so stupid had also remade his timepiece into a versatile super-weapon. <em>Gimme!<\/em><\/p>\n<p>No use.<\/p>\n<p>The officers got out and cuffed him to <em>a chorus of raspberries\u00a0<\/em>from the other pedestrians.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: medium;\"><span style=\"line-height: 24px;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><br \/>\n<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>a chorus of raspberries gimme! groped for buttons on the underside hollow-eyed and pale spread-eagle on the hood of the patrol cruiser unmitigated imbecility Dave could not believe his own unmitigated imbecility. He frowned through the windshield at the policemen, hollow-eyed and pale, from his perch spread-eagle on the hood of the patrol cruiser. He&#8217;d [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[120,332,201,77],"class_list":["post-370","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-cop","tag-crime","tag-money","tag-unmitigated-imbecility"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/370","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=370"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/370\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2086,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/370\/revisions\/2086"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=370"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=370"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=370"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}