{"id":3309,"date":"2015-11-04T08:18:21","date_gmt":"2015-11-04T13:18:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.skelleyverse.com\/?p=3309"},"modified":"2015-10-31T14:00:36","modified_gmt":"2015-10-31T18:00:36","slug":"dont-patronize-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/dont-patronize-me\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Don&#8217;t Patronize Me&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/k-avatar-e1443983846496.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-24\" src=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/06\/k-avatar-e1443983846496.png\" alt=\"k-avatar\" width=\"81\" height=\"81\" \/><\/a>Or Jack Kerouac?<\/li>\n<li>simulates the roar<\/li>\n<li>so soft and so elegant<\/li>\n<li>severe attack of vomiting<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Don&#8217;t patronize me.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><em>&#8220;Don&#8217;t patronize me.&#8221;<\/em> Stacie glared up at Derek. &#8220;Just hold my hair.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Derek&#8217;s few memories of the previous night included more than enough drinking to account for Stacie&#8217;s <em>severe attack of vomiting<\/em>. They both had way too many cocktails, something with a kooky name and blended with shaved ice to a creamy texture and topped with an orange-peel origami swan. The drinks were <em>so soft and so elegant<\/em> it had been hard to decline as the next one was offered. And then the next. And the next, until inside your head their cumulative effect <em>simulates the roar<\/em> of the ocean in a seashell, drowning any coherent thoughts and drowning out the voice of reason.<\/p>\n<p>Derek liked to go to parties so he could feel like his heroes. Like Fitzgerald, or Hemmingway. <em>Or Jack Kerouac?<\/em> But his taste in drinks was more like Patricia Highsmith.<\/p>\n<p>bonus points for using them in reverse order<\/p>\n<p><a title=\"Stichomancy Writing Prompts\" href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompts\/\">about stichomancy writing prompts<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/stichomancy-writing-prompt-generator\/\">try our stichomancy writing prompt generator!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Or Jack Kerouac? simulates the roar so soft and so elegant severe attack of vomiting &#8220;Don&#8217;t patronize me.&#8221; &#8220;Don&#8217;t patronize me.&#8221; Stacie glared up at Derek. &#8220;Just hold my hair.&#8221; Derek&#8217;s few memories of the previous night included more than enough drinking to account for Stacie&#8217;s severe attack of vomiting. They both had way too [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[319,4],"tags":[330,91],"class_list":["post-3309","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stichomancy-prompts","category-writing-prompts","tag-alcohol","tag-bonus-points"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3309","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3309"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3309\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3314,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3309\/revisions\/3314"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3309"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3309"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/runeskelley.com\/skelleyverse\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3309"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}