The Spy Spoke at Length
that medicine cannot cure- wrasslin’ around with a wet individual
- meticulously mapped out
- by all means, fuck who you want to fuck
- laser danger!
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The spy spoke at length in his outrageous accent about how he and his mysterious female contact shared the kind of love that medicine cannot cure. After half an hour I was tired of hearing about it, so I left him alone with Fleur and went up one floor to the basement. I had seen a coffee machine there on the way down.
My brother Jim was there, still in his blue panda costume. He’d been following behind us on the stairs, but having six infants strapped to his torso really slowed him down. At the moment he was changing the diaper of one of my quadruplet sons.
“How’s it going, Jim?” I asked.
In a surprisingly upbeat voice he said, “At the moment, brother, I’m wrasslin’ around with a wet individual. Things could be better. But all things considered,” he shrugged his shoulders to indicate the other five babies, “they could also be much worse.”
“Coffee?” I asked, hefting the pot.
He nodded, his big blue panda head wobbling. “You know, I always thought that you had your future meticulously mapped out, you and Jason both. I expected him to end up with Kelly and you to end up with Tessa. But now, you’ve got so damn many kids by so many women. And more on the way!”
“Hey, that Isolde thing wasn’t my idea,” I said.
“I’m not judging,” Jim drawled. “By all means, fuck who you want to fuck. That’s between you and your wife, and she seems to be cool with it. At least so far. But man, I wouldn’t want to cross her if I were you.” He strapped the newly diapered baby into its harness and sat down beside me to cradle a mug of coffee between his panda paws. “Those blue eyes of hers pose a real laser danger!”
“Fleur and I have an understanding,” I said. I heard her footsteps coming up the stairs, and hoped that that continued to be true.
bonus points for using them in order