Tagged: menu

Our Ship Rocked and Pitched

  • k-avatarour mole-eyed contemporary
  • is best read in complete silence
  • pushed the throttles to full power
  • under the influence of the impending storm
  • we showed you how to be a gynecologist

Our ship rocked and pitched under the influence of the impending storm as our captain pushed the throttles to full power just to hold position and I handed the dinner menu to our mole-eyed contemporary who squinted and mumbled (although a list of entrees is best read in complete silence, as anyone with any manners should know) and you blushed and squirmed as we showed you how to be a gynecologist, if you know what we mean.

bonus points for using them all in one sentence!

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Rocky Sat Down on the I-Beam

k-avatarThis week’s stichomancy prompts were pulled from the menu of a local watering hole. Our critique group used the bar as an emergency backup meeting location once when our regular haunt was unexpectedly closed. Lucky for us, the menu was full of interesting phrases, ripe for the picking.

  • tuna croissant
  • Jamaican me crazy
  • glass or pitcher
  • and a splash of cream
  • so it tastes like sugar

Rocky sat down on the I-beam to eat his tuna croissant 80 stories above the noisy street. Irv sat beside him and unpacked his usual: macaroni and a splash of cream. Rocky often wondered about Irv.

“You been down in the sixties lately?”

Irv meant the levels where the building’s interiors were coming together. Up here it was still all exposed steel, but a few hundred feet down they were painting the walls and moving in furniture. Rocky grunted and shook his head.

“One place in there, gonna be a pet store. Lotsa cages.”

In fact, it was a laboratory.

“And above that, they got mini-golf with real sand traps, only insteada sand it’s some other kinda stuff so it tastes like sugar.”

Rocky often wondered about Irv.

“When you go down there, make sure not to touch any of the glass or pitcher winders.”

Rocky grunted again. Maybe Irv would soon be done talking.

“Well, can’t sit around all day. Foreman tells me, ‘Jamaican me crazy!’ and swings his dreads around. Freaks me out.”

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All the Artists

by jenThis week’s stichomancy prompts were pulled from the menu of a local watering hole. Our critique group used the bar as an emergency backup meeting location once when our regular haunt was unexpectedly closed. Lucky for us, the menu was full of interesting phrases, ripe for the picking.

  • artists, intellectuals, and merchants
  • cabana boy
  • Magic Hat #9
  • key lime pie never had it so good
  • the only truly authentic brand of Worcestershire

All the artists, intellectuals, and merchants in attendance could agree on only one thing: the hostess was serving the only truly authentic brand of Worcestershire sauce available on the island. The soiree quickly devolved into their petty arguments about every other subject, including which cabana boy was the most effeminate, and whether the Great Rudolfo, the island’s only truly authentic magician, was wearing Magic Hat #9 or #13, both of which were made of purple velvet.

In the midst of the cacophonous conversations, Reggie approached the buffet table and asked the docile manservant what the enchanting green dessert was. When he told her, she exclaimed, “Key lime pie? Never had it!”

“So good you’ll weep,” the manservant assured her.

Reggie took a slice for herself, and one for her studly lover Lazarus.

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