Tagged: dance

Chauncey Knew

  • by jena great deal of reviewing
  • He got down with raised eyebrows.
  • she did not respond to him in a favorable way
  • for no special reason
  • proximity to money and power

Chauncey knew the way to win Myrtle’s heart was by winning the dance-off at the senior prom. After a great deal of reviewing how-to videos on YouTube and practicing in front of the mirror, he was ready. Chauncey’s rental tuxedo was a stunning combination of white and gold that some people inexplicably saw as blue and black. At the country club he stood in line with all of the other hopefuls. The music started. He got down with raised eyebrows. Despite his sick dance moves and the soulful expressions he threw at Myrtle, she did not respond to him in a favorable way. Neither did the judges. They awarded the trophy to Mike Phillips for no special reason that Chauncey could see, except for the fact that Mike Phillips’s mother was a senator and the judges were all blinded by his proximity to money and power. But not Myrtle. She left the prom the way she arrived, surrounded by a group of indifferent girls dressed all in black.

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I Hated Working At The Strip Club

  • by jeneye contact during a fingerbang
  • those nicknames were always for in-family use only
  • The adventure of the Devil’s Thumb
  • the most hackneyed of subjects
  • hoping for a glimpse of the glamorous chorus girls
  • seemed to be by no means diminished
  • zoo for endangered species

I hated working at the strip club. I know that’s just about the most hackneyed of subjects imaginable. Sorry. I never would have started dancing there if I hadn’t needed the money so bad. The front row was always full of guys drooling like poachers at a zoo for endangered species. How much nicer if they’d act like society gentlemen merely hoping for a glimpse of the glamorous chorus girls they’d heard so much about. There were never any gentlemen at the Devil’s Thumb, though, just drunks and frat bros who expected you to maintain eye contact during a fingerbang in the private room for a lousy tip.

The adventure of the Devil’s Thumb was in never knowing when the place would get raided, but the clientele’s libidos seemed to be by no means diminished by threat of arrest.

One night I was on the pole and I heard someone shout, “Hey Boo Boo, check out the tits on Skeeter!” and I knew I was in for it. Those nicknames were always for in-family use only, which meant that a couple of my cousins had just figured out where I was working, and in no time my whole family would know. Damn you, Boo Boo!

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Arnold Gazed in Dismay

  • by jenthe vulgar world of newspaperdom
  • did not suggest a tightly packed foundation
  • my island, my mountain, my land
  • whatever portion of the anatomy
  • it’ll swallow the house
  • roller coasters, whorehouses
  • “Oho. Deranged am I?
  • don’t like being put in such a position

Arnold gazed in dismay at the stripper. Whatever portion of the anatomy she chose to display, it did not suggest a tightly packed foundation.

“Her ass is so big it’ll swallow the house,” he complained to his pal Ricky.

“I like it,” Ricky replied.

“You’re deranged.”

“Oho. Deranged am I? Well at least I’ll get laid tonight. Nothing pleases you, Arnold. Not roller coasters, whorehouses, or foot massages. This is my island, my mountain, my land, and you’re making me feel like an inadequate host. I don’t like being put in such a position and so I shall banish you back to the vulgar world of newspaperdom from whence you  came!”

“Whence?” complained Arnold. “Who uses that word anymore?”

 

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Felix is Plotting a Rampage

  • by jenthe plight of the American stockbroker
  • with a long-lost sister
  • dancing the wicked flamenco
  • are they being worn by non-members?
  • he will not hesitate to shoot you, whether you voted for him or not

Felix is plotting a rampage at the school’s Homecoming dance. He’s in the running for Homecoming King, but don’t assume you’re safe if he wins. He’s so disgruntled he will will not hesitate to shoot you, whether you voted for him or not. So go ahead and vote for whoever you think is cutest, or whatever the criteria are for the position.

You may well ask why Felix is so bent on dancing the wicked flamenco of destruction. He told me he is concerned for the plight of the American stockbroker. I think he was being facetious.

My theory involves Felix’s recent meeting with a long-lost sister in which she expressed her horror at the thought of outsiders wearing country club jackets to the dance. Have you heard anything about this? Are they being worn by non-members? And if so, is that a call to arms?

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“No, no, no, no, no, Chico!”

  • by jenhe was like a cat pouncing
  • immobility his eyebrow moved
  • noticed the colour of your dressing gown
  • rather the Latin temperament
  • Not even a compromising bequest!
  • a most awkward mistake
  • They die, yes

“No, no, no, no, no, Chico!” screamed Thelonious Tharp, and Chico Desideria knew that once again he had made a most awkward mistake. Chico both admired and despised his choreographer and mentor, Thelonious. Admired him for the way that when he danced he was like a cat pouncing, despised him because he possessed rather the Latin temperament and made no move to disguise it.

Chico knew what mistake he’d made this time. He was supposed to prance and cavort, leap awkwardly in time to the arrhythmic music, and then freeze. But despite his required immobility his eyebrow moved. Thelonious was livid, as usual.

“Chico, today when you left the dressing room I noticed the colour of your dressing gown had changed and I hoped that your attitude had changed along with your sartorial choices. I was wrong! You are as useless as ever! And you know, don’t you Chico, what the parents of one as unimpressive as you do? They die, yes, die! Of shame! And they leave nothing to their disappointing offspring, Chico. Not even a compromising bequest!”

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No Farmworker Would Have Dreamed

  • by jenthe rest of his orchestrated performance
  • moving in slow, sensuous circles
  • playing vixenish games
  • You dolt! You’re freezing!
  • mock anger crystallized into the real thing
  • he heard a very feminine “oo-oh!”
  • no farmworker would have dreamed

No farmworker would have dreamed that one of their own kind would have success in the high class world of cruise ship performers, but here Bubba was, standing in the wings, wearing his elaborately spangled costume, waiting to make his high-seas dance debut. He heard a very feminine “oo-oh!”, his cue to take the stage and begin moving in slow, sensuous circles with the other dancers around the female singer. The air conditioning was turned up full blast to cope with the heat generated by so many bodies exerting themselves, dancing and singing on stage, playing vixenish games backstage.

Finally it was Bubba’s moment to shine. The singer was singing her angry song, telling all the men how worthless they were. Bubba swooped in, just like they’d rehearsed it, and swept her high into the air above his head. But in that instant the singer’s mock anger crystallized into the real thing.

“You dolt! You’re freezing!” she hissed to Bubba.

After that Bubba found it difficult to go on with the rest of his orchestrated performance, but he remembered the other farmworkers who looked up to him, and that gave him the strength he needed to go on.

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2013 Holiday Prompt

In this special holiday edition, the stichomancy prompt phrases were all taken from Christmas carols. Jen and Kent both tackled the same set, with markedly different results. Whose do you prefer?

  • so lively and quick
  • dashing through the snow
  • he began to dance around
  • tis the season to be jolly
  • nine ladies dancing
  • when we finally kiss goodnight

k-avatarKent’s take:

“I forgot these things were so lively and quick,” Herb remarked, drawing a bead on one of the creatures dashing through the snow in the clearing.

“And I forgot they bite! Ow!” exclaimed Remmy as he began to dance around holding one boot up out of the deep drifts, a creature dangling from the toe.

Herb chuckled, prompting Remmy to ask him with some vehemence just what was so damn funny.

“Oh, nothing. Just, tis the season to be jolly, I suppose,” drawled Herb in reply.

Remmy shook the xenopod loose and stomped it, muttering about better times before the invasion. “I’ve had enough for one day. Let’s go get drunk at the Nine Ladies Dancing. I’ll buy.”

“Okay,” Herb said. “I’d like to see that sweet little barmaid again anyway.” Herb’s opinions on the invasion were slightly more mixed. “When we finally kiss goodnight, I’ll find out what those suckers on her tongue feel like.”

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by jenJen’s take:

My blind date with Bertram started out well enough. I found him to be so lively and quick-witted that I was able to overlook his unfortunate ears. I thought him quite galant when he offered to pay for dinner, but halfway through the meal he began to dance around in his seat like he had to pee. Then he grumbled at our waiter, “It’s winter, dude! Tis the season to be jolly well sozzled so you don’t notice the cold! Bring me a yard of Schnapps! And one for the lady.”

He finished his shots in record time, and most of mine, all the while telling the tale of a bachelor party he’d recently attended where there were no fewer than nine ladies dancing naked. I was unimpressed.

Bertram’s fate was sealed when he said to me, “Hey babe, when we finally kiss goodnight, I’m going to slip you the tongue.”

Horrified, I left him at the table and went dashing through the snow and wind all the way to the subway station so he couldn’t follow me home.

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Thelonious Tharp’s New Jazz Dance Spectacular

  • by jenso alike and yet so different
  • that question? Plum
  • commentators were criticizing
  • we packed our biological agent
  • both punk rock and rap

Thelonious Tharp’s new jazz dance spectacular, We Packed Our Biological Agent, is what the commentators were criticizing.

“Why did he incorporate both punk rock and rap?” asked Kent.

“They are so alike, and yet so different from the jazz music he should have used!” cried Jen. “What could he possibly have been thinking?”

“How can anyone answer that question? Plum, the professor, did it in the conservatory with the candlestick. That’s all I know,” said Reggie.

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Traveling with Diplomats

  • k-avatarnot always the cleverest
  • pretend to hold the wheel
  • staying at the Austrian embassy
  • I wished to shake her sang-froid
  • the long-legged Englishman
  • the length of his mustache
  • A good scent?

Traveling with diplomats is not always the cleverest way to see the world. The accommodations are usually posh, but infested with spies.

Once, while staying at the Austrian embassy in Australia (or was it the other way around?), I found myself ensnared in unseemly entertainments which led to a course of antibiotics. I’d tailed a sultry espionage agent to the private club in the basement, and although I wished to shake her sang-froid she only wanted to shake her money-maker. Then she’d pretend to hold the wheel of a ship and cry out, “Thar she blows!” each time the long-legged Englishman recrossed his ankles. I think she was impressed by the length of his mustache, and its scent. But was it a good scent?

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Were He a Commoner

  • k-avatara bonny lord and a merry one
  • under the eyes
  • grinned involuntarily with appreciation
  • blue-gray eyes suddenly keen
  • would have been described as stocky

Were he a commoner, Smedley would have been described as stocky. But he was a bonny lord and a merry one, often at the same time, and so he was accounted robust of stature.

Smedley’s position at court afforded many luxuries. His special favorite was dancers, one in particular with many jingling bells and cymbals and tattoos under the eyes. When she swayed and twirled before him, Smedley grinned involuntarily with appreciation for her grace and flexibility, which a, shall we say, stocky personage might view in more frankly vulgar terms.

One gusty winter night a new dancer appeared before Smedley. He sat forward in his chair, blue-gray eyes suddenly keen. The newcomer’s feet were just as nimble, howsoever they might be clad in perplexing low boots that set up a clattering like hailstones with her every step. The cane and the straw hat confused Smedley most of all.

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